By Dana Heriot

Early morning commuters to Brisbane CBD were held back from clocking into purgatory this morning due to a partial tunnel collapse near cultural centre bridge.

The busway, which gives many dead-eyed workers the chance to see the sky before entering their for profit prison, was closed due to the potential disaster it could unleash.

“Honestly, I wouldn’t have even been mad”, says Clara a big 6+2 firm clerk, “I’m already dead inside so let them finish the job, aye?”

Others who initially thought the delays were due to a protest, are somehow delighted. Jon, a 31-year-old accountant explains:

“Yeah look, when I thought it was those climate activists again, I was stoked. I hate my job anyway, and this way I got an extra hour on the bus to binge some Netflix. This extra hour of freedom will stop me from resigning for at least another month haha!”

This reporter can attest that the early morning vacant stares of workers who hasn’t yet had coffee filled the roads in a dull trudge to their respective workplaces. Perhaps the totter will be good for all our silly little mental health.