By Alexander Curtis

It’s been more than a month since our last article. Dear readers, did you miss us? We missed you more. But fret not! New semester, new us. To kick things off, we are breaking and exiting the fourth wall with intent to explore a timeless philosophical quandary!

With semester 2 officially set to kick off in a week, I find myself confronted by a daunting dilemma that demands a decision. One that could dictate the trajectory of my semester as I know it. When ISSAC’s simply won’t suffice, I turn to you dear readers. My closest confidants.

Can I really be fucked to go in for week 1 just to hear about academic integrity from 4 different lecturers?

After spending the last six weeks telling my parents that I had some serious uni work to do over the break, it may indeed be time to commit to the bit and return to making university my entire personality. But long gone are the days of first year. There’s no shot I’m arriving to the lectures 20 mins early to copy down the PowerPoints. Speaking of PowerPoints, I can very well guess that the semester overview will be scraped together from the introductory modules on Canvas.

Next there’ll a revision of the academic integrity policy. Then comes the policy on Gen AI (plot twist: we can’t use it). There’s actually no need to bother with either of these disclaimers however, as they will most certainly be copy-pasted into every email you are sent for the rest of semester. We might even commence with some completely irrelevant historical background that will not be assessed in any way. Then the cherry on top is a recommendation for an $180 textbook that I would pirate source online if I actually intended to read it.

Accordingly, I’ve come to the conclusion that copy-pasting the unit outline into a fresh Word doc would be equivalently productive, and hopefully enough to start building the momentum I need for my academic comeback.  

Next week I might debate whether week 2 is all that necessary either, especially since the class rolls haven’t been marked since Torts.

If you have an opinion you wanna share, feel free to trauma dump in an email to gsj.officer@qutlawsociety.com!